Belated Merry Christmas

Before I even start to write here,I would like to wish everyone a belated Merry Christmas to all my readers! I hope everyone had a blessed and joyous Christmas this year like I did. I'm aware of the fact that I had neglected my blog for so long. I don't know,I'm just too lazy to update lately. 

So how is everyone's Christmas so far? Saw lots of tweets and post about how boring their Christmas was or how much they lost their Christmas spirit and all. From my perspective,I really don't think they should said this. I mean,no matter what circumstances,you should be happy to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ, don't you think so? Its just from my point of view,so no offense alright. As for mine,I just love every single moment of it since Christmas eve. Almost attend open house everyday;near and far. I just love the fact how Christmas brings every family closer and those moments are so meaningful to me. I love how I bonded with my cousin on the 25th because we usually will be there till evening due to another dinner at granddad's but this year,my mum,aunt and uncle decided to switch dates to 26th just for the sack of 25th,so we got to enjoy our Christmas day celebration till night time. No doubt I must admit that I had the best Christmas celebration this year compared to the years before. Maybe it is just me or so. I just experienced something different but good this year.How I wish I could just share it here but I guess I would rather share it to 2 close cousins only,to make it more secretive and special I guess. Haha I don't really know what I'm talking about right now.

So what really happen since the 24th huh?

• 24Dec: Midnight mass in Stella Maris Church and light and simple dinner at grandpa's
• 25Dec: Christmas mass in Stella Maris Church,visited grandma's graveyard and lunch-dinner celebration at aunts
• 26Dec: Christmas dinner celebration at granddad's 
• 27Dec: Out with my 2 cousins to Suria
• 28Dec: Went all the way to Tenom for the Open House then Papar for the family reunion.
• 29Dec: Uncle's Open House and Family day (which is today)

Tomorrow's plan is to go to church, probably to Suria after that to buy some stuff and do some shopping then buy school necessities. So many errands to do tomorrow. Yeah I guess this is all at the moment. Will be uploading selected photos in my next post. 

Rest In Peace Akung/uncle

He's so cute really and he has a lot of hat collection! Btw,he wore this to school everyday <3

While I was on scrolling down the screen on twitter,one of his grandson tweeted something. I was really curious about it and wonder "Is it uncle? or maybe someone else?" So I asked him and when he said it was his grandfather,I was really gobsmacked! Almost emotional though. I've known him since I was a freshman in Convent cause I used to buy him fruits almost everyday. As the time goes by when I was still in form 1,during recess,one of me senior called me to to canteen and ask me to meet him. Without knowing, he suddenly told me we are related and he's my uncle! We talked for a while and starting that moment on,he started giving me free fruits! I didn't want to because I felt bad but he insisted so badly and I didn't want to offend him or anything so I just accept it. Occasionally,I'll ask my friend to buy for me because I'm not an opportunist person so that explains. As the year goes by,he will always ask about my family,my studies and greet him every morning whenever we meet outside the school gate until starting this year. I remember he didn't sell fruits for quite a while due to him went to Australia(if I'm not mistaken) to stay with her daughter for a while. When he got back from Aussie,I was extremely excited to see him that morning so I went to greet and hug him! I think he was happy to see me too :) A few week after that,he didn't come to school to sell anymore. But occasionally,if I'm lucky enough,I get meet him in church with his wife. It's really devastating when I couldn't recalled when was the last time I met him. Saw quite a number of tweet and wall post from the Franciscan and to be honest,anyone who knows will definitely know how kind-hearted,friendly,cute,hilarious and noble person he is. My friends and I started calling him "Akung" last year because he's too cute like that :D Hopefully I could attend his funeral to give my last respect. May Uncle Rest In Peace and always be with the Lord in Heaven :')

1st Anniversary

A year has passed in just a blinked of an eye since he went back to the "Father". Like literally,it felt like just yesterday I just met him. In just a year time,a lot of things has changed especially me,in a good way though,the way I think,act,accept things/changes and the list goes on. I acknowledge the fact that I'm still trying to accept and still wondering why of all the bad people,He was chosen? And deep down inside,I'm still hoping and wishing we could turn back the time and wish that the accident didn't happen-although its impossible obviously- but i know we had to move on. It's not that I'm still grieving or whatsoever,I'm just wishing though. So this year would be the 2nd Christmas without him(otherwise it would be the third by then) nothing has change with or without him. It's just that no one's gonna tease me anymore on Christmas just like he did when I first met him. I'm not gonna tell anything details here because it's too public. If only I have a friend to talk to about this but well.

'A life so young released to heaven , left on Earth we wonder why, But some are sent among us briefly 'Some have Spirits meant to fly'

' If tears could build a staircase up to heaven, I'd come up there and bring you right back down here'

' The price to pay for having someone special touch your life is the sadness you feel when they're gone.Even though it cost me tears the memories were a bargain'

' A smile can hide the tears, a laugh can hide the pain, but nothing stops the longing to have you back again'  

p/s: Found some quotes from the internet.

Short update

Good afternoon there! Woke up late today at 11. My fault though for staying up till 2 plus this morning. Had a really bad gastric around 2 for no reason cause I had 2 and a half pieces of pizza for dinner last night. Tried restraining the pain by going to sleep. Had my my delicious brunch just recently. Chicken Soup book has always been one of my favorite and inspirational book for ages now. Read few stories earlier and guess what? Few stories touches me and I was actually crying but I didn't let any tears stream down my cheek cause my brother was there that time.

Done half of my packing just now. I'm really so lazy to pack but mum keeps on nagging and force me to pack my ear could actually burst,I'm serious. Will continue packing later and will be doing some workout before we head to the airport. Cousin's competition tomorrow and I'm really excited to surprise her! Can't imagine how she'd react once she saw us there.

Anyone heard about the accident happened last Sunday involving this 2 cousins who died ( on the scene and hospital)? I really feel sad about it and condolence to their family. His(the late) dad(quite close to my dad's family side) was in Labuan with the UPKO association,my aunties/uncles and my dad and his father just got back from Labuan on that night itself. I don't his father got to meet him before the incident happened. Imagine you're on your way back from somewhere when your loves one died at the same time. Obviously I won't be able to attend the funeral this Thursday cause I wont be here. Sometimes I just wonder why some people just wish they were dead with some small problem they are facing when they are people who wants to leave long but their life was taken by God at their early age. Okay I shall stop before I'll be all emotional.

I guess this is all for now. Will update probably a week from now.

Holding back

Morning everyone! Last night was really a blast.I have totally forgotten about my aunt and lil cousin from Labuan who will be joining us too lol. Bonded with my cousins and I literally ate a lot. Ordered our food but still wasn't full so we ordered burger,lamb,brownies,apple crumble and cola float to share among 3 of us. Didn't regret it and tonight we might have a dinner a grandpa's with the same crowd as last night. Can't wait!

I don't know what happen to me last night. Wanted to sleep but out of nowhere,I caught myself having tears streaming on my cheek. Was crying about stuff that I've been holding back,again. I think this is too much information,I apologized.

I gotta continue practicing this piece right now.Having my piano class later. I'm so lazy to go -.-

Unproductive day

Where have the old fun and socialize girl who does productive things during her free times gone too? After my morning workout,light breakfast and lunch,all I did today was sitting in front of the laptop doing something meaningless. And what I did was playing online game,read people's blog,9gag and drank a bottle of water. Oh my,what am I turning into now? I know it is all depend on me on how to make my day well spent but I apologized. I'm so lazy lately. The only thing that I change from a lazy person to a better person was doing my daily workout and house chores. The rest? Man,drastically going down to level zero! I promised,after I blog this entry,I'll get up from this sanity and be a productive person. But beforehand,must do my evening workout first then chores and all because tonight,I'll be heading out to Sailor's with my mum,siblings,aunt and cousins for dinner. I think tonight was the first I go out ever since I got back from miri. Oh my so sad oh. Yeah I think that's all for today. It's time for some workout!

Enthusiastic

Good morning! Woke up at 7 plus today. Didn't know what made me cause I usually will be up by 9 plus or latest by 11 but I think my intense workout yesterday made my body more energetic and active so yeah,I just did my morning workout and had guava and water earlier and right now I'm having my favorite 'Sky Flakes" biscuit. Lunch today will consist of carbohydrate so most probably I'm going to cook or perhaps,my brother should? But last night he ask me to cook for today's lunch. Will see then.

So anyway,I was suppose to blog yesterday but because of my addiction towards this one game I play was too strong,so I forgotten about it. Plus,I was pretty busy yesterday so it doesn't matter anyway. Oh yeah,my mum just told me about this one event happening this Sunday (http://www.soroptimist.org.my/walk-the-talk/)   I'm not up to elaborate it so kindly read the link I gave. It's open to anymore so bring along your friends to join this event. So back to the story,my mum & her friends asked me to be their photographer of the day and their reason was because I took good pictures and I love taking pictures. I didn't want at the first place but mum forced,threaten me about something and of course I had to obey her because she's my mum,so I had to agree. Well at least its not a formal occasion and all needed is a sport attire,so I'm up for it!

Like I said in my previous entry,I want to spent my few days before leaving to KL with cousins or friends but   the thing is,I haven't been going out for a while now and I'm really not in the mood to do so. Am I that anti-socialize already? My aunt even brought me out to watch Breaking Dawn2 but I turn it down. Probably I'm going to hang out with cousins this coming Saturday because we're waiting for my 2 cousins to sit for their last paper,if I'm not mistaken today and another cousin to finish up his last day of practical in Hyatt tomorrow. But friends? I don't know. It's like everyone is busy with their own thing and .... Yeah,I'm not going to say it in public so yeahh.. Moving on,another workout session this evening coming up. I really have to do an intense one just to cover up my few days not exercising when I'm not around. Because I only have like one week to exercise before Christmas,once I'm back. Not to mention,Christmas gathering is always the time where I'll or everyone will eat like there's no tomorrow. It's so delicious and you just couldn't resist it!

Motivations

Couldn't agree more with this!

Go on! Start it off right now! Don't slack or procrastinate. It's really worth it!

Restless body

Like I said in my previous entry,I will try to update if I'm not being a lazy pig or what so here it is. Currently not doing anything. Wanted to dance again but I already showered so,that explains why I am sitting in front of the laptop. My body is totally exhausted and restless right now due to the dancing I did for more than 5 hours. Honest speaking,I actually enjoyed myself moving and dancing around like nobody's business UNTIL my male neighbour caught and saw me dancing,which was totally embarrassing! I'm not even kidding about how embarrassed I was. But I didn't let it bring me down and instead,I continued until around 6. Crazy but fun. Was suppose to have dinner in Lido or Sailors but bro was so lazy to drive,so mum ordered Pizza Delivery instead. I don't really care bout the calories I'm about to consume because I know I burned a lot today by sweating for hours,so it was okay. Bro even teased and assumed I ate 4 freaking pieces of pizza when I actually  ate 2 and a half(it's even hardly half,maybe a quarter?) only.

Right now I really have nothing productive to do so I might gonna watch another romance movie and cry all night. Hah sounds like a plan! Do you know what would happen when you have a fragile and sensitive heart and feeling? Yeah,I just discovered 'something' which I already suspected last month but I thought it was just nothing but right just now,everything just freeze for a second or two after I saw 'it',yeah obviously I just felt like a sharp knife just stabbed my little fragile heart into pieces and I almost shed tears,but I didn't. But its okay though,at least I don't have to think and wait any longer because I know the truth already. So guess I'm okay :)

Maybe I just confused all of you,but don't worry thought. It's nothing big actually. Really. So goodnight then for now,I'm going to watch something right now and I'll try to update again tomorrow if I'm not lazy. x

Too long

Hello hello good morning there! Woke up pretty early just to watch one movie on the television. Although I’m still tired and sleepy due to sleeping late last night just to re-watch Dear John-which I tend to watch over 5 times already-but never fails  to make me shed tears every time I watch. This obviously explains how fragile and sensitive my heart is. Been watching couples of romance movie lately and sometimes I just wish I could experience it again, but ... it’s okay though. Moving on, I managed to skipped dinner last night because I don’t really feel like eating and yes Granddad came over around 9 to sent some durian from our tree in Papar. Thought I could eat it today but mum insisted to eat it last night with her. Was not in the mood though because it’s already past time, taken my supplements  and I’ve already brushed my teeth. But I couldn’t resist it because it’s the ‘Milky’ durian which is my favorite but not to forget, ’Dahit’ are my favorite too! So that’s mean I had to brush my teeth again for the second time. So anyway, I was wondering why was everyone craving for it so badly which you could easily get it but I guess I was too ‘used’ with Miri’s price where they sell cheap durian everywhere you go. Like literally everywhere you go and it is damn cheap compare to here! I clearly remembered how my aunt bought 9 durian for only RM50 but here you could only get like 2-3 durian for Rm50. Just recently, my cousin told me the price of the durian went literally down due to the durian season and you could at least purchase 5 durian for only RM10?! I’m pretty sure they prices here are still expensive but lucky enough we actually own our own tree which we could just get them for free. Even my dog, Snowy loves eating durian! I’m just too lazy to take my camera and capture how my dog ate it.  But after all, I had to suffer smelly fingers,stomach ache and bad-durian-breath while I sleep, which is a bad thing.  So luckily, I decided to cut my fingernails short on Sunday for the first time since I last cut, and that was somewhere in October(I actually dislike keeping long nails but for a change, I would love to grow it longer and paint it red) because I felt really disgusting and dirty. If only I didn’t, there will definitely be some durians stuck in between my nails and that’s just making the smell worse and makes me feel really disgusting.

 Enough about durian-talk for now. Okay what day is today again? Man, I really had to check the calendar to even acknowledge what day it is today. Lol so much for a forgetful person. My goodness,I even just remembered something my aunt told me during the reception last Saturday. She requested me to choreograph a dance or two(because she love seeing me dancing and also my steps, which I hardly could believe but thanks) for his son’s wedding next year on the 26 January if I’m not mistaken. I don’t really mind actually but I just thought it was a little last minute already and I’m kind of out of idea right now. But will see though. If my cousin is lucky enough, which meant I’ll be dancing during his wedding because I had to sacrifice time and maybe carve some ideas out of my head. The wedding is in less than 2 months time and my little cousin is pretty busy with her training( 6 or 8 hours per day) for her upcoming competition in KL and I will be there as well for almost a week. Which meant I am really running out of time to practice. What was I thinking man?! I mean I’m like so free today until next Monday, so why don’t I use these free times to maybe choreograph something? Lol silly me! But p/s again, it is all depend though whether my cousins and I are really going to perform, or not. What I’m really going to do now is, search for some songs and maybe check on some dance on youtube to find some ideas. I never thought that I could say this again, but I actually miss dancing and creating dance as well. Super excited to be precise! It’s just that through dancing, I feel very happy and peace as well stress-free because it takes my mind off things for a while and all I gotta to find this is just by dancing. Haha okay I think I get to mushy-mushy and corny already. I just realized I just type out a very long post. Please bare with me while reading it okay? I apologized if it bores you. 

Got to go right now. If I'm not being a lazy ass later,I'll try update later alright?

Cute baby/toddler

When you are a baby lover,you just love everything about them.Especially the cute ones. Sometimes I just wished to have another baby sister or maybe more baby cousins? So that I could babysit them or dress them up. Found some cute videos on youtube that made my day :)

She almost make me cry with her :/ so adorable la

Isn't she so cute? Been watching this video for a couple of time already. She talks a lot and is very enthusiastic! And when she made her sad face,awwwww I just love her!

This is so adorable dont you think so?

Laziness

Hello there again. Haven't been on the net since the last time I blog which was last week. Nothing much to update though. I'm just going to update about my day and some other stuff. Woken up by a phone call from my cousin just to ask us to open the door.Thought I could sleep longer but too bad I didn't. He was kind enough to make breakfast for my sis and I today. Didn't do any productive things the whole morning till now. Gonna do some chores and exercise later. Oh and watch few movies on laptop tonight. Is it obvious that I'm too lazy to update? With all these short sentences and comas? Okay anyway,my family and I had our cleaning spree yesterday-which was super and extremely tiring-the whole house. My parents were like "Get rid all the unwanted stuff from your room and throw it in the plastic bags" and I cracked some jocks saying "Yeah sure. The room will definitely be empty by then *chuckles" and they said "Don't be stupid and DON'T simply throw stuff okay" Lol when I said the room will be empty,I really meant it actually. But anyway,I'm glad my sis and I decided to take out our study table just so to give more free space for us. After all,I don't usually study in my room so why not right? So instead,I use my table as a dressing table to put our 'girl stuff' on it. Even if I want to study in my room,I can always study on my bed though(which was pretty rare.Only during exam season).

Lately,I've been feeling really different in a sense that I don't even care about anything that I used to care before,anymore. Like I prefer to be alone or maybe sometimes with family and relatives only. I find it really hard to explain it so I would prefer to keep it to myself only. Sometimes I just wonder if only I'd have the guts to tell someone about how I feel,will the situation change?